Return

Автор: Anastasia

The stewardess put a glass of water on the little table in front of me and I reached for it, slowly sipping water and finally getting back to the reality. I didn’t notice we were already over Europe and ready to land in half an hour. Gerard has been watching me all the time since I woke up and there was concern in his dark eyes. "You know where we’re flying?"

I smiled weakly: "I’ve got no idea." "Not that it should bother you," I added hastily, seeing his reaction.

Gerard fell silent for a while, then spoke: "We’re going to Rome and that is where I’m going to meet some Americans. It’s business, considering wine. I’m going to travel with them round Europe. Would you like to stay with me as an interpreter?" I didn’t know what to say, I was stunned. "Not that I want something from you," Gerard hurried on, thinking I was abused. "It’s just that you could need some peaceful atmosphere for a while."

"No, you misunderstood my silence; I was too surprised to answer anything. It’s too good to be true, besides I am not sure about my abilities to translate into French," I was so excited that I completely forgot about my problems with French and spoke rather rapidly.

I think Gerard noticed it because he smiled: "It’s all right, I don’t mind your translation, finally I can understand some English. Do stay you’ll stay with me!" his eyes were pleading. I considered the situation: I had nowhere to go, I couldn’t yet return to US, not with Elsinger on my heels. I had no relatives or friends in Europe, perhaps some old buddies from Oxford but I haven’t seen them for a long time. There was really little comfort to know I was all alone in the big Rome but everything was different with Gerard by my side. "I’ll be your interpreter," I said, "thank you very much for the proposal." His eyes lit up, delight written on his face. I felt a twinge: he looked so much like Connor at that moment, my heart fell. "Thank you, Lindsay, you can’t imagine how I appreciate you’ll be with me," and as I returned his hug, my heart was bleeding: I wished so much it were Connor.

The plane landed and we got out. I was waiting outside in the clear winter day while Gerard waited for his luggage. I had nothing: only a handbag and the clothes I had on. While leaning to the wall, I was watching the people crowds. There it was, the happiness I longed for: a woman hugging a man, who just came out of the building, a little child laughing and chatting, a couple of students walking down the street. Even those who were parting seemed to care for each other. I thought back at the time I was a careless student, at my first years at the O.S.I.R. I never feared anything, nor did I feel ill at ease: there has always been Connor by my side and I somehow knew his unseen angel was guarding me. Now it was over. Only sadness was left. I blinked, to get rid of the unshed tears in my eyes. I wished it were only hard wind that made them tear.

"American?" a voice asked. I turned my head and faced a handsome fair – haired man who was standing next to me. "Who are you?" I returned his question. "Harold Smith, from the wine company," he smiled and stretched out his hand. This European way of greeting was not new to me but still I lingered to shake his hand. I was relieved to see Gerard emerging from the hall, a porter behind him carrying the bags. "Hi, guys," he cheerfully greeted Harold and the other tall man, standing a bit aside. Then he turned to me: "That is Lindsay Donner, my interpreter. Isn’t she a treasure, not trusting the first man she sees?" They all laughed and I felt their eyes upon me.

"Welcome to Rome, Ms. Donner, I hope you’ll like it here," Harold smiled to me.

"Thank you, I’m sure I’ll will," I followed the men to the car, waiting for us. The car drove through the narrow streets, heading the suburbs.

"I thought it would be better to live outside of Rome, it’s not that noisy," Gerard told me as we drove on. I only smiled; I was in no mood of talking.

"Which state are you from?" Harold asked, turning to look at me from his front seat, "I’ve never seen such beautiful women." I lowered my eyes. It was usually like this and I was used to such remarks. Every man working with me was usually ironical, everyone except Connor who’s been treating me just like a colleague from the beginning. Nevertheless I didn’t mind, I couldn’t help being what I was and I wasn’t going to do anything to change my appearance.

"I don’t stay in the same state for a long time," I said in my usual voice but I wasn’t going to be especially nice to him any more. "My work doesn’t let me settle."

"We’re matching each other perfectly, I also travel a lot," Harold smiled again and this time it was an indecent smile.

"I don’t have something against it but I think my friend does, he would surely mind if you traveled with us," it was a lie but I saw with triumph that Harold blushed. Gerard and our second companion, who was called Edward Wells, watched us: Gerard obviously amused and Edward rather confused. My lie did help though, no stupid questions followed during the way to the hotel. As Harold drew to a halt, we all got out.

"I won’t mind if you let me know about the key to your suit," Harold said.

"And I won’t mind if you want to clean up there while I’ll be away talking with Edward," I retorted, taking Gerard’s arm. "I’m finally an interpreter and I’ll have a lot to do. Thank you gentlemen for the escort," with these words I smiled and headed the stairs.

Gerard looked back, waved to the Americans and then turned to me: "Sorry, I didn’t know Harold was such a womanizer. He must be a real problem for you."

I shrugged: "Harold’s not the first womanizer I met and the most I’ve been working with treated me at first this way. Believe me, I’ll be able to cope with him."

Gerard smiled: "I’m sure you will, you’re such a determined woman." We parted at the door of my suit.

Gerard took my hand: "Well, we’ll part, I’m sure you’ve got a jet lag and long for some hours of sleep. I’ll see you tomorrow then, at eight if it suits you."

I smiled: "Of course it does, till tomorrow then."

I was a bit sorry to part with Gerard, being with him meant forgetting my sorrow for a while but on the other side I needed time for myself to go over the facts and to decide what I was going to do next.

I "unpacked" and thought that tomorrow after the meeting with Gerard and these Americans, I should do some shopping. I was sure it wouldn’t be a problem because I had my credit cards with me and therefore all the money I needed. On the other side it was dangerous to use them, Elsinger could easily track me out and I knew his intentions only too well. I had to talk to Gerard; he might be able to talk me. As I took my bath, I lay thinking about future lying in front of me. I couldn’t return to US and even if I did it, I couldn’t let Elsinger know, I was sure he was going to kill me. Oh, how foolish I was to warn Rollins! It was me who needed a baby – sitter and who had to be cautious! If I only knew that the Connor – Doyle – call was a trap, I would have been wiser and I wouldn’t have told so much to Frank. For a short moment I toyed with the idea of going back to Archangelsk, where I lost Connor. I couldn’t explain why I wanted to visit that place after all the pain and the tears but it was like a magnet to me. Perhaps it was a foolish belief that Connor could still be alive. I almost laughed at this thought though I was on the verge to tears. It was impossible Connor still lived, I saw the plant blowing up in front of my eyes. "Lindsay, I’m giving you an order. Leave now!" these words still echoed in my mind. He couldn’t have done it better, I thought. No matter how deep my pain was, I was still grateful to Doyle he did his best to defend the team. No one really suffered – except him. This is what Connor always wanted. I wished I died with him but it was a stupid wish, even if I died in Russia, it wouldn’t change anything. Another useless self – sacrifice performed to steady Elsinger’s plans. I let out a deep sigh. I still had no idea what I was going to do. Of course there were some friends in England, "old buddies" from Oxford but I haven’t been in touch with them for ages and I couldn’t go on traveling forever – I had to find a job or something like this. By the moment I was pretty sure Elsinger fired me – or spent his time preparing his speech he’d held at my burial. Just like the one he held, as Connor didn’t return from Archangelsk.

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