Return

Автор: Anastasia

The bright December day did everything to lift my spirits and as the taxi came to a halt near a bureau, I almost forgot our strange talk in front of the bank. Gerard helped me out of the car and told me: "You know, I don’t’ hire a car cause I’m never sure of Italian cars, it’s a horror to drive in Rome!" I believed him because I’ve already seen that crazy traffic in the Eternal City. We entered the building and almost at once were brought to Harold’s office. He was obviously glad to see me: "Why isn’t it Ms. Donner just walking into my office? Can I call you Lindsay by the way? Ms. Donner is too official." Edward, who was already present, threw him an exasperated look. I shrugged: I knew it would go on like this till I left. "Good morning Mr. Smith, Mr. Wells," I lowered into a chair, offered by Gerard, who didn’t give Harold a chance to go on: "Let’s start, gentlemen, Lindsay, are you ready?" I nodded and they started discussing the wine business. I was rather bored, it’s never been interesting to me but I had to translate and did my best. How often I thought that back to US I would have been somewhere in the mobile lab, together with the team. Even Praeger seemed now all right to me. Mercifully, after five hours the torture was over and we left the two Americans. Gerard and I parted at the entrance of the building, I was going to do some shopping and he wanted to visit some French friends of him.

As I walked down the streets in Rome, I was fascinated by the ancient city. It wasn’t called Eternal City for nothing. Unexpectedly I found myself at the foot of the Capitol Hill and spent the next hour wandering among the stones. I felt at ease there, having only stones for the company, no one who could harm me. Strange how quickly I became suspicious of everyone, being rather knowledgeable in psychology, I guessed I was about being paranoiac. It was of course nothing good but considering the situation I thought that it was inevitable. Feeling a hand on my shoulder, I almost screamed out loud and sprang back, gasping for air. There was a man standing behind me, obviously Italian. He was as frightened as I was and as he saw my big eyes, he started to explain me something in Italian. I shook my head: "No Italiano, only English or French." He understood English because in the next moment he told me in a heavy accented English: "It’s not a suitable place for a lady like you, there’re a lot of thieves out here and you should better look for a safer place." I thanked the man and let him take me out of the Capitol ruins to the bus station. "This bus will bring you to Vatican, there’re a lot of works of art there, you’ll be ok," he said, casting me what I thought to be a strange look. My paranoia didn’t let me go and my common sense set off all kinds of alarm bells in my head. Why would a man I saw today for the first time in my life be so worried about my well – being. Of course I was rather pretty but it couldn’t be the reason. He had to know who I was, someone was after me. That is why I entered the bus and took a sit so that the bus driver couldn’t see me, I had a feeling he was intensively watching me. As I saw that there was a large group of tourists getting out of the bus five minutes later, I followed them into the bright sunshine. The bus drove away and I started to walk away from the bus stop, forcing myself not to run not to arouse someone’s attention. He found me in Rome, I thought, he’d find me wherever I go, there was no escape. I didn’t use my own credit cards; I took the ones Gerard gave me so there was no way Elsinger could trace me. Couldn’t he? I thought about Gerard. Was it only a coincidence he had the two tickets and allowed me to follow him to Rome? Goodness, I was overreacting, I thought as I visited the shops one after another, trying on and buying clothes without really knowing what I did. I must have been a rather interesting sight: I could bet the shop assistants considered me nutty. I didn’t care; I was too deep in my thoughts to notice the looks they exchanged. It was so unlike me! I was usually very conscious of every word told about me, about every hint dropped. Not nothing mattered, it seemed to me in these two weeks since Connor’s death I changed more than in the last two years.

"Lindsay, I’m so glad to see you here!" in the mirror of the fitting I suddenly saw Harold’s face. I wish I were dreaming. "Oh, you’re a cutie in this dress, it suits you," but Harold was real and I had to face him.

I turned around and openly eyed him: "Harold, what do you want from me? Why do you follow me wherever I go?"

He seemed to be at a loss, a feeling strange to him as I fancied. "I just like you," he finally stammered, only to say something.

"But I don’t like you and I’m not in the least pleased to "enjoy" your society," I didn’t realized my voice could be so icy. It had something to do with the situation.

"I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bother you," Harold was confused. "But it’s you who behaves strange: first you smile and laugh and then get angry. It’s not normal, you know," now he sounded angry. It was the hurt pride. I turned away to hide sudden tears in my ears, I couldn’t speak.

"I’m sorry, Harold, you better go," that was all I managed to say and burst into tears I couldn’t control any more. Harold rushed to my side, frightened: "Lindsay, what’s wrong?" I neither heard nor saw him, my mind was far away in the past.

"Donner, what’s wrong?" I could hear fear in Connor’s voice over the co link, though I knew he did his best to control it. I watched for the last time the werewolf, bending above me and fired. I just scolded Connor for being far too cautious, speaking with Peter but now I was so grateful to have the pistol in my hands. I wasn’t afraid, there was Connor on the other side of the wire and I knew he wouldn’t let anything happen to me. "I think I hit him," I whispered to Connor and I knew he was already on his way to me. Everything was going to be all right.

"Lindsay, can you hear me?" voices grew louder, making my headache. I didn’t want to open my eyes, I didn’t want to go away from the place I was, from Connor, I didn’t want to lose my memories. And I didn’t return to the reality, I drifted away to a cozy darkness.

"Does she have such attacks?" I recognized Harold’s voice.

"I don’t know, it happens for the second time and each time she seems to go further and further. No one can reach her. I wonder if it has something to do with this Doyle, who died somewhere in Russia," it was Gerard. My heart sank. I didn’t remember telling Connor’s name to Gerard, nor did I mention something about Russia. Perhaps I told it out loud as I had one of those "attacks". "Anyway it was something serious, she wouldn’t behave that strange if it were a nuisance. I opened my eyes and saw that I was lying in my hotel suite, both men sitting on the sofa opposite my bed. "She’s conscious," Gerard was the first to be by my side. "Honey, you gave me the creeps, do you feel all right?" his eyes were dark with worry. I opened my mouth to answer but realized I couldn’t speak. "You mustn’t die, it’s not the right time," Gerard said. It was a strange thing to say. Harold also sat down and took my hand: "Lindsay, can you imagine how you scared me and all the shop assistants? Just to start crying and then to faint!" I could finally speak: "Was it that horrible?"

Harold shook his head. "No, not really but it was a …" he paused to find the right word," a rather strange thing to happen." Gerard looked at me and I could swear he understood each word Harold said; his knowledge of English was really good.

"Well, I have to go now, the doctor said I shouldn’t torture you with talks, you need some peace. I’ll see you tomorrow," with these words Harold squeezed my hand and left the room. Now Gerard and I were alone.

"Lindsay, promise me you won’t do something like this again," Gerard was the first to speak.

"Gerard, why are you here? Why do you care for me?" the questions escaped my lips before I could realize what I was speaking.

Gerard looked at me and then suddenly took me in his arms: "I love you, Lindsay, I loved you from the first minute I saw you. You shouldn’t leave; you should never go away from me. You must promise you stay. We’ll always be together, we’ll live somewhere in France, have kids: little girls looking exactly like you," he smiled tenderly. Now in his arms I longed for this life. Farewell to the dangers, farewell to Elsinger, farewell to O.S.I.R.

No, it was not the right way, I couldn’t leave the Office, it wouldn’t be right. It was like giving up: me, usually zealous and facing danger, to quit O.S.I.R just because I wasn’t safe and sound for some time? It wasn’t Lindsay; it wasn’t what Connor would have liked me to do.

I gently got free from Gerard’s arms: "No, Gerard, I won’t stay with you. I’m very thankful to you for all you did to me and I’m terribly sorry but I can’t. I love another one."

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